I know i said i would not be writing anymore blogs until the 20th... but this i can not help.
"And I'll never give myself to another the way i gave it to ya..."- Rihanna ♥
I feel like i finally checked out of "rehab" and i feel like this was a really bad "trip". They say that if you love something you should let it go, and if it comes back to you it's yours. I don't necessarily believe in that anymore. I thought that i could move past the hurt and not think of it anymore. I thought wrong. The fact of the matter is rather than cleaning up the situation and making things good. We (This guy i met my freshmen year in Ms. Baldwin's Eng 101 class) decided to sweep things under the rug. According to 12 steps, the first step is admitting that there is a problem. He pretends that things are all good, and he will hit me up, when it seems pretty convenient for him. Does he ever stop to think that he is impeding my progress. I am having fun, meeting a lot of guys and they think i am pretty. Never once has he ever said anything that validates why he continues to try to communicate with me. When i asked questions about the status of what "we" were he would dodge the question. I didn't ask because i wanted to be exclusive. I asked because i was talking to someone else at the time and i was trying to evaluate whether i should take that step with the other guy. Silly me, because that guy is awesome. He has been there when things were just ill. He cares about me and all that he asks is that i am honest with him. When I experienced the shooting incident, he was there.However the game completely changed earlier this semester. I forgave that indiscretion, because i was not jealous nor will i ever be.Let's face it i was talking to someone else too, but i never made it official. He picked her for whatever reason and he liked her more than me. It was cool, because it is not the first time nor will it be the last that another female is chosen over me. It happens to the best of us. I was going to give things a second try, but after he was trying to get with my friend(via facebook) like i was not going to find out, I was just like," girl let it go." So there you have it. I am over it, and over him. I am having too much fun, to even consider going back to a time before, When I wasn't that pretty girl everyone wants to hang with on the weekends :)
2 comments:
I hear ya girl! That mess is over and done. We know we'll never forget those boys, but they were put into our lives to teach us things about life and love. We can't regret cursed gifts like those. Best of luck to the other men. I honestly think I may be getting the luck I deserve. I'm so psyched!
nifhmmm....yup...niggas never know what they got into its gone. And they hate when they see a nother nigga have something that was once there's does the appreciation set in.
You have always been pretty, Alex and a dude should never validate that for you. But since it's happening on a daily basis, doesn't hurt either..lol..
you should leave that nigga b....and let him dwell while on christmas break, and if hes not coming back with substance...than just like with "Rehab" that nigga is gonna get flushed....A.S.A.P.
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